The word alcoholic is a loaded one, and one that some people choose not to use. I can completely understand why. It conjures a very specific image of someone at rock bottom and carries connotations of failure, weakness and a lack of self-control. The paradox is society celebrates booze but demonizes dependence. Alcoholism is stigmatized and shrouded in shame, which may stop some people getting the help they need.
For years, I would have admitted to drinking too much but I would not have described myself as an alcoholic. In fact, I know I would have been defensive if you labelled me as such. Denial is a well constructed fortress for concealling additction. I didn't drink everyday, I was academically accomplished and I have always worked full-time. Surely I couldn't do this if I was an alcoholic? But this was high-functioning subterfuge. I worked hard because I drank a lot and guilt propelled me to make up for it. Inside, I still felt a disappointment. I'd convinced myself needed a drink to be sociable and feel confident, or to unwind and have some me time. I had a deep-seated emotional dependence on alcohol, and it was a bad habit that got worse.
Drinkaware defines three signs of alcoholism: impaired control over alcohol use, giving increasing priority to alcohol, and unwanted physical and mental affects from drinking. Tick, tick and tick.
Language is very important - people should have the right to self-define because it signifies they have taken back control. We are all different. Imposing and internalizing negative labels can have negative consequences for some. My drinking had been challenged on more than one occasion - despite varying approaches by the people who cared - to be dismissed or minimized by me. When it came to a critical point, I personally found saying 'I am an alcoholic' liberating. It is a well worn adage that admitting you have a problem is half the battle, and without any euphemism to equivocate around, it helped me on the path of positive change.