ABOUT ME

Sober AF

My name’s Amy and I’ve made the choice to go alcohol-free. For me, alcohol had its highs - and lows. I could be the outgoing party animal – dancefloor-filling, this-one’s-on-me good time guaranteed. But I was also someone who hid how much and how frequently they drank. I drank because I was happy. I drank because I was sad. I drank when socialising. I drank when alone. I drank because the day had a y in it. But it wasn’t until recently that I stopped to ask why – why was I doing something that was increasingly making me feel so awful? - and yet I kept it up.

I’m early on my sober journey but as soon as I made the decision to ditch booze, a switch flicked in my head. Sobriety means my glass is no longer half empty – it’s overflowing. I have more of everything: more time, more energy, more possibility.

There is fun in being alcohol-free and I’m proud to be sober AF.

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WHEN ALCOHOL NOW LONGER SERVES YOU

Going sober in a boozy world

My drinking had red flags for a long time, but I ignore the semaphore spelling out STOP. I scored highly in every test about whether alcohol had become a problem, yet I continued to drink. Case in point: age 30, I celebrated getting the ok for liver function test by going to the pub (preloaded with some solo Stellas). I would go two weeks without drinking to dispel any thought that I was dependent. But once that cork was unscrewed, there was no getting the genie back into bottle. I couldn’t moderate. The proverbial one drink just didn’t exist for me. I had to call time on alcohol for good.

We know alcohol can be harmful but mainstream culture still seems to brush the dangers aside. The reason for this cognitive dissonance is that our society is steeped in it. Alcohol is the way to celebrate, unwind and socialise. This fortifies the delusion and denial used to defend drinking and is the gateway to the grey area. By the time I had turned 40, drinking sessions were less frequent but markedly boozier. My tolerance for alcohol had increased with age, as had my budget. And I couldn't moderate. Typical case of all or nothing.

Going alcohol-free requires a new mindset and reframing your relationship with alcohol. Drinking became my toxic trait, which is little surprise when you remember that it is a toxin. The day I said no more, I found it relatively easy to relinquish my emotional dependence when I realised it was the cause of my unhappiness. Spending every Sunday in bed with drop-gut dread feeling like my bone marrow was now battery acid, it became a no-brainer.

I have said to everyone please don’t change because I have – although but it does seem crazy how we elevate drinking when you think about the effects of alcohol rationally. If it was discovered now, booze would be banned. Yet it's the only drug people ask why if you don't partake in it. Going alcohol-free is a personal choice that can sometimes feel at odds with the consensus. A social drinker asked how long I am going to be alcohol-free for and was incredulous when I replied ‘forever’. Not everyone will necessarily understand why you have given up for good. That’s fine. Resolve comes from remembering why you have made that choice.

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WHY GO SOBER?

There are many reasons people say no to alcohol. So, whether you’re completely alcohol-free or sober curious, this blog is for you. I’ve found a whole new community and alcohol abstinence is an upward trend. According to Drinkaware, 39% of adults drink less than once a week and the biggest group of non-drinkers is young adults, with 21% of people aged 18 – 24 not touching a drop at all. The image of staid teetotalism is being replaced with something much more fun and attractive. Low and no alcohol options are popping up everywhere, and I will be taste testing the range of 0% - 0.5% abv bevvies available (there is no way I’m just drinking Diet Coke) and letting you know where’s good for a mocktail.

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FIRST SOBER CHRISTMAS

First sober Christmas felt like a real milestone. Christmas had been a licence to drink exactly how I wanted – that is from when I got up to whatever wee hour I called it a night. Spending a notoriously booze-soaked holiday sober reveals a lot about previous drinking habits. The only time I really craved alcohol was when I was on my own. My partner is an emergency worker, so once all the last-minute festive preparation was done, I was idling time alone and would’ve happily accepted a large glass of red. This feeling did pass as soon as I was in company. I’m lucky that my friends and family barely drank alcohol around me. In fact, Mum hid the Bristol Cream, which did elicit an eye roll.

For alternative social elixirs, I turned to Sentia Black (£29.50 at sentiaspirits.com). Drank straight up or with a mixer, this lives up to the claim of the two-drink buzz. Christmas Day breakfast of smoked salmon and scrambled eggs was toasted with Freixenet 0% (£4.25, tesco.com). Sipsmith (£19.00 waitrosecellar.com) does a very decent AF gin. Refreshingly paired with tonic, it tastes just like the ‘real’ thing.

By New Year, I was feeling happy and confident in the company of my husband and best friend to see 2024 in without a drop in sight. That was the first time since the age of 12 that no alcohol passed my lips on NYE and the night had a childlike exuberance (maybe because of all the soft drinks, maybe because I was brought back to more childlike times). The more adult tipple of choice was REAL Royal Flush Non-Alcoholic Sparkling Tea, a sparkling Darjeeling, which we popped open at midnight. We went to bed at 2am still giddy from giggling.

Craving alcohol at Christmas is inevitable – ‘tis the season to be merry after all – so be ready with your drinks of choice. Personally, I prefer beverages that don’t mimic alcohol versions, which can be triggering for some sober folks. I must admit, I found myself still guzzling down sparkling low alcohol wine and G&Ts half expecting to get tipsy. Enjoy alcohol-free drinks for what they are and experiment with something completely new - there are plenty of alternatives out there. Sentia Black and ginger ale was the winner for me. What I really enjoyed was spending quality time with my nearest and dearest without the alcohol haze.

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ABOUT ME

WHEN ALCOHOL NOW LONGER SERVES YOU

WHY GO SOBER?

FIRST SOBER CHRISTMAS

Sober summertime sips

Delli Sober Curious Spring Box review

Sentia Gaba Spirit review

Luna de Murviedro Alcohol Free Rose review

Thomson & Scott Nougthy Alcohol Free Sparkling Chardonnay review

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Erdinger Alkoholfrei Beer review

Brooklyn Low Alcohol Special Effects Hoppy Lager review

Impossibrew Lager review

Nozeco review

Crossip Hibiscus review

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Mother Root review

Impossibrew Hazy IPA 0.5% review

Beavertown Lazer Crush IPA review

McGuigan Zero Sauvignon Blanc review

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Zerozecco review

Three Spirit Sharp review

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